<body> -learn to love myself more than anything- <body>
Tuesday, October 27, 2009

knock off work earlier than normal today because i started working at 8.45am -_-"
because i have been busy with one work lately,
a commercial one,
so really cannot breathe.

sometimes,i really feel like giving up this job.
its really stressful, especially when you meet difficult customers.
i want to tell boss, i wanna give up le, im on the verge of letting this go.
but i really enjoy my time with them, and i love doing this.

recently,it seems to me that there are alot of trouble and unhappiness going on for me.
first is the stupid wenghong wanna come find me trouble dunno over what shit -_-, damn bloody lame one la.
oh gosh! he is still young la, when is his fault, he push until the whole world blames me.
second, is one of my customer.
i dunno how to comment this.
i really dunno.
i really feel like quitting, everyday crying because of this issue, until this issue is settled, then i would be able to work happily.
im wondering whether this is my fault, because i really dunno wats wrong?!
maybe im still fresh in this line?
wat is going on lehs?! can anyone tell me? i feel damn demoralized le..
BOSS! I WANNA GIVE UP LE!

i feel really damn stressful, not my mistake, i get watever shits they give me, my mistakes, everyone will step me like hell, i really dun wanna go that stupid showroom, everyone in that showroom is so so so so damn fake(the furniture line ppl), i really hope to tender in my resignations, and just leave like this.
but i wanna be responsible for everything that i have done,
i know running away from problems doesnt serve or do me any good.
but the problem is, how long can i ever take this?

i just wan my customer's issue to settle asap, i very stress liao! everyday work,FIXED timings, even weekdays, also same timing. its really unlike my previous company's timing, at least i dun have to work for long hours, and then can work shifts, there the transport also damn hard(sungei kadut), when there is nobody in the showroom, i would starve, because the furniture people wont be so nice to pack food for you.
all these things which im going thru, who will know?
im no longer enjoying my job like how i used to be!
i really hate my job now!
9 HOURS, not convenient because I STAY AT WEST COAST, and the two showroom is at macpherson and sungei kadut which i have to take taxi in practically everyday! my expenses where got enough to cover?!phone bills also increasing like shits,
and who will ever know it?!
i really really really damn damn damn damn tired le...
wo zhen de hen xiang fang qi!


but i really thank god,thank god for at least giving me something good in return.
at least i have love by my side.
if not, i would really break down and cry like shit!
and i would really give up doing everything that i am doing now.
thank love for always being there to withness me crying,
and hugging me tightly to tell me that he will walk thru these with me.
i thank love for letting me know that everything which im facing now is just obstacles set by god.
because god wans me to learn wats the right thing to do and wans me to be strong.
but bibi, i really dunno how to be strong now,
im hurt too badly once,
everytime i face a difficulty now, all i will do is cry cry cry and cry.
i really cant clear my mind to think of wat i should do next.
ever since i go that showroom,
i have been becoming more and more upset, and unhappy about life.
everything negative starts coming in.
im sorry bibi, everyday, you have to withness me crying, and i know,
it really breaks your heart.
but i really dunno how to be strong, im like on the verge of the mountain, i jump, also i wrong, i dun jump, also i wrong,
i really dunno WAT I SHOULD DO NOW.
i really feel like giving up le!!
sorry to always make you feel heartpain,
but i appreciate you, treasure you, because no matter wat happens, i know, you will be right here.
THANK YOU, bibi((:

I went off @ 12:29 AM