<body> -learn to love myself more than anything- <body>
Tuesday, March 22, 2011

LAUGH WHEN YOU CAN, APOLOGISE WHEN YOU SHOULD & LET GO OF WHAT YOU CAN'T


thinking too much, seriously, my heart feel damn unsafe. sometimes i asked myself not to think so much, but still here i am again to think so damn alot. The only thing which have been keeping me going, is my love for you. But i feel that, even with the love, when my heart doesn't feel safe anymore, will there be a way which you will be able to heal my heart back to normal? Back to the time which I love you right from the start..

As what my title have told all of you, I am supposed to be doing that instead, but perhaphs for some reasons (which i do not know what), i can't seem to let them off.. He shared alot of things with me the other day when things were damn rocky for this relationship, which I seemed to have etched them deeply right into my heart. I dunno what are the ways which I can do, or anyone can help me, to forget, to let go and not to remember. Why can't I just for goodness sake treat it as if nothing have happened, why must I always remember whatever shits he says including the fact that at times, he said I am fatt -.-"

Loving him is just something that cannot deny the fact that I do feel a thing for words he says
I love him, which is also one of the reason why I want to forget all these! ARGHhh, I am seriourly feeling damn horrible terrible la..I feel horrible because the fact is that I can't forget whatever he have done(especially those that were fcuking hurting) & I am pretty sure, he knows where he has hurt me/what is the things which have hurt this little heart so deeply..

1 years 5 months, I enjoyed myself, I feel the love from him, most importantly, he is always there whenever I needed him. Because the fact that he has always been around me, spinning,joking,laughing,quarreling around me, I cannot do without his presence, I am so used to seeing him getting scolded by me, so used to his cute way of asking me for things, whether he can do this and that. DEFINETLY, it is not RESTRICTION (*which he always feels & ASSUME that it is), its actually how you look at it, I just hope that everything you do, I will be kept in the loop. Honesty.Trust.Understanding is what I really want to see in both of us.. will you?
Please promise to stay close & never go away already alright? iloveyou

Although work haven't really be smooth for me, but I know I will hang in there, because of you, because you want me to, thats why I want to. Everything that you expect me to do or wants me to do, I will always do my best to fulfill them, but I sincerely and truly hopes that you will change to become a better and different you which I love. The one whom I knew, 1 year ago(:

goodnights world, i deserve a better day ahead!(:

I went off @ 11:29 PM